Experiment Vol. 2

So, 12:45 - some hour of nap, max - and my weed is here. Its fascinating, how amongst all the games I have on my PS Vita, Downwell is one of the ... I don't want to say 'more outstanding' ones - but it is, and in that it is a gem. Even on the PS4. Yea. Those are the games! OK, maybe ... we have some advantages today that lead to other, maybe 'more' outstanding games - but there isn't really a 'more' or less comparison for me in this sense.

Its a game - and at that it is good. Maybe it is this simplicity that made it easier 'back in the day' to make good games. But ... it also was possible to mess shit up. I can't say whether its good or bad - but messed up is something I can harp in on.


And TB almost cried over Pyre. I haven't finished Bastion yet, ... and I would want to play Transistor before I got into Pyre. But Bastion too was a pretty ... [insert quality term here] ... game. Good? Sure! Fun? Well ... what is fun? Did I enjoy it? Yea - thats the thing. It was really simplistic at first; And I don't remember much of the later game except that I was stuck on doing some challenges; ... but yea ... it ... grows ... kindof. And I would say that the narrator certainly adds to the experience.

And there is this thing. Like ... between Final Fantasy 1 and 15. Is FFXV actually still Final Fantasy? Up until 10? Combat was turn based. Now its really ... quite the opposite. Although - at a certain point the game can actually be boiled down to making the same kind of decisions - just at a different rate and pacing. I think it would be interesting to see a FFVI/Mystic Quest type of setting - with all sorts of spells and GFs - back to that level of complexity - in this style.

I kindof definitely sortof really really would certainly like to work on that game. I mean - Square ... soft - those were the guys that made Secret of Mana and Secret of Evermore as well. A lot of good stuff is coming from that corner; And I kindof feel that sometimes they don't get enough credit for their past. I mean - from the stance of all those ... that have fond childhood memories of some of their games. ... And in this breath I find it important to point out that 'maybe' it is all in all ... as a general thing - everywhere ... good, to maybe think a little bit more about 'that': The past. To stand still for a moment - and observe our modern society - ... . Hmm - I mean, the way I see it we're all looking forward, one episode chases the other, first comes this, then that, then something completely differnt and 'ooh' new stuff - although ... Spiderman isn't really new. If anything, we're in the ... 4th live action movie series? And those games. We once were looking forward to games with shitty graphics, I think - or weren't we? I remember looking forward to Donkey Kong Country however - and Secret of Mana had neat Box Art. At the very least was "Shitty Graphics" the 'High End' - at some point - although, as soon as we get to 256 colors ... things kindof ... exploded. Kyrandia is to be noted on the beautiful (but to me really nothing else ... it, doesn't make sense to me) side, X-Com on the really innovative end, ... and where has that come from?

I mean - the further we look into the past, most of the interesting stuff seems to be stories about rulers. And it makes sense. Little is preserved of those days ... if anything, then mostly just remainders of what used to be civilizations. The Bible is really unique in this sense though. It makes sense that it begins 'in the beginning' - but 'the actual beginning' was ... God talking to Abraham. Or, Abram - as he was called prior to that. I mean, thats the beginning of the Biblical sense. But I digress.
And actually its even further down the Line - with Moses. Then there was 'great Israel' - of which we "hear many rumors" (in the Bible) - which fell ... and what remained of it ... is now in part preserved within the Bible.

But anyhoo. What is there to be known about 'ordinary people'? What do we have here? In Germany? First everything was peaceful and thriving until some power from the south made its way through the Land. Those Romans ultimately got beaten - but soon thereafter arose 'the Holy Kingdom of Rome' - or what was it - and those Romans eventually became germany.

But what about us? In this story? So - some King came in and ... everything was good? Am I mistaken or is that roughly the beginning of the Dark Ages? Well - to be sure: By 'Dark Ages' I most specifically, according to the best of my knowledge, mean that period of time of which I have no memory whatsoever - but most of what I see anywhere about it is 'not good' - except you were rich.

But that ... that ... was ... I just stumbled upon that thought there.

Back to the past, or present - so, past. Thinking of 'what us people' were interested in - historically - well, ... fiction is older than video games. Drawing, Writing, ... Crafting. So, there has been chess - and if we look at the high society of that time - and that is really where the 'pronounced' cultural exchange would happen or manifest - preserved by walls of stone rather than ... wood. I'm not really an Anthropologist - but eventually we find our first Migrants to the new World - ... and yea, if Trump wants to shout "America to the Americans" - and all his garbage baggage - what does he say? He builds the wall to lock themselves out? I mean - I purposely did not try to make any sense here. It seems like its pointless either way. But maybe I so ... got to the bottom. He drives the USA into a crisis.

"Killing 'the Beast' from inside".

And feeling all proud of it - probably. Whatever. Shrouded by Mystery - there is something going on. But so yea - looking at the past ... when guided by a book or movie ... or narrator ... is one thing. But so you should stop, for a moment - and try to see your contemporary real life experience in its fluid transitioning through the past. Take reference to the world - looking forward and backward.


I don't see any cultural achievement quite as ... 'dense' ... as our Internet. Its ... funny, now that I say that. I mean - it is said, usually, that piracy was forcing the movie industry to adjust ... and so ultimately streaming services were born and because we generally implied that the www was a global thing for everybody ... this is sortof what the internet is. So just like nothing there was nowhere where information couldn't spread. A movie? Wait until it gets out in Germany? Oh ... err - thats. Woops. Wrong page. Watching a movie in the original language ... ... I mean, the more you think about it, the worse it gets - because ... wouldn't it be good ... if now everything got region coded and certain things made unavailable to certain people?

Isn't that a step backward? But yea - the problem is that we as people do not have any conscious handle of this. In some way our minds are still stuck in the Dark Ages ... Feudal Times ... or ... "some minds" ... might I say. This somehow came out of nowhere - although - it also somehow came from this 'Land of the Free' - the 'Free World' - good stuff, Unity and Peace and Freedom ... after something got defeated. Hmm ... dark images flash through my mind.

So - on the one side there is this common sense that we should be divided - and on the other side this common sense that we should be united.

But then - Video Games. Final Fantasy 1 to 15 is like a time index ... you might also want to count Street Fighter 1 to 5. I mean - Street Fighter may just be the oldest e-sports around ... unless people start to pick up pong.

Watch - ^^ - a 2 hour lifestream of - ^^ - a Pong Tournament. Well, could be ... mesmerizing. There is weird enough shit on the Internet - I wouldn't be surprised. I mean, is Street Fighter that much different? ... ^.-. From Pong to Tennis Sims ... or just look at GTA or the Sims. And yea - as we go on there is more and more - and more ... stuff - once unheard of, the tensely awaited, ... and then old.
And we kindof have come to a point I feel where we ... sortof drown ... as we ... sortof "have so much shit" we start to 'overprint' history. What happened last year? Two years ago? Well - my recollection of time that long happens by key events. I know when I graduated High School - and I can kindof count my way through from there. I also know what year I got born and what year we have today. Else I guess I wouldn't know how old I am anymore!

Plus Minus 1 year.


I think the concept I'm trying to convey here is a bit too much. As it goes on - I ... all this is so far is purley ... an accident. And so I stumbled upon something, which reminds me of an older thought I had. A few days. "Anti GamerGate". Or rather: #ResetGG. The idea being ... well ... if I think correctly ... so there is this chance ... that things are as I see them - if I don't see multiple things. But anyhow. ResetGG is about to broadcast a message, whereby now pivotal YouTubers get together to inform their viewers of something as an alliance. Independently, they speak to their Audience while 'as bunch' assembling around a unique ResetGG hashtag. The point is that each YouTuber would probably connect to his own audience based on their own common sense. (So would things like Console vs PC not really get an issue. Or SJW nonsense. As we moved forward. Thereby each has their own ResetGG narrative. So the idea is to bring multiple interests together - in a not only 'Gamergate' related 'backlash' - where this 'multiple ID thing' is a safety web for maintaining individual ideas as we moved forward as a unit.)

The idea is basically to create a 'round table' on the internet - and to create something as a public 'we, the gamers' "Pseudo Republic" - "Face Wall" - to make clear who 'we, the gamers' are - through the faces we empower to stand there as one who has spoken for us. Are we Killers? Are we Racists? Are we Mysogenists?
I mean - take a good look at those guys who run 'Pretty Good Gaming' - what do they look like to you? Oh, appearances can be deceiving! Good point!

But - "I'm just saying" - that 'maybe' - those are just harmless white dudes that do something with their lives by doing something related to Video Games. "The" Dream Job. Well, behind the scenes ... bla bla bla ... different and - not so much ... well, realtime conversations ... downtime ... points on the map - ... well, whatever.

Why is it better to get slapped left and right - than punching back? Its ... in every theoretical scenario ... in the grand and psychologically philosophical ... always the better way out. It goes to say ... that this is the only way to truely maintain peace with yourself. To some that doesn't count. But for the rest - we at some point have to wonder, what do we do? Well - we can play video games! A big fucking load of "Giving a shit". We can 'spread' - and in no time - we are the future. And this world will be a better place! What do I mean? We play games and give a fuck! And how that does help? Well - by giving I fuck I mean, that ... what you did so far - I suppose. If there is anything worth giving it up for ... well, who am I? Nonono.
We just ... change our game ... and those craftsman who have honoured their crafts and got crafty in the crafting of crafts (not so sure here) that managed to amaze us - "assemble" - ... or maybe ... not ... that way - ... - ... "and forge the almighty a " - mirror - worthy of his light. Or - something like that.

"weapon of mass destruction to smash the heathen beneath your feet". How would it be - to run a TV channel? So - content creators get time on a schedule - ... err. But no - maybe, something has to remain special. Lets call "him" 'the Narrator'. He takes the lead as Head of Communications, and he first manages the response team. Here the main focus would be on a presentation of the ResetGG Network, without going into any detail just yet. Except so their follower count, or what have you? ... Can this work?


I'm kindof missing the point here. So, how this now relates to the previous part, is in that both cases a pivotal focus is in the presentation of a greater whole; Where many pieces come together, however, sometimes part are missing or twisted - and this ... is in the end what ResetGG 'needs' to be. So yea, the challenges are ... how to summ all the things up - ... err, to then ... do what? Can we convince ourselves that we 'can' convince anybody? And now ... 'who are 'we'' in this scenario? Are you? OK, trick question? But yea - we start where we are ... and ... whatever that there isn't right now - that just and simply, is - not right now, or ... right now not. However the case ... what were the case, in some case, were now, that those who know - were then to know more - (Rose - a.k.a.: "Dhalsim X Cammy"? [Then Rose is really bad in dealing overhead damage, but in compensation gets better throw and offense. Her Super in a super competitive sense therefore 'should be' an unblockable Command Grab. Second choice: A defense mechanism. Third choice: Ultimate Forward Velocity. On the other end when balancing Dhalsims range with Cammies speed and agility - so, maybe she should be a bit floaty like Dhalsim. Err ... let me reformulate that. We could use that as a starting point ... but so - ...]) - and from enlightenment came enlightenment - and so and forth.


And now - on the other side, I thought - what better time would there be for me to start bitchin' about myself again?
I think, in the end I might prefer to feel insecure and wait things out a little - because thats how it is ... of course. And if I'm unlucky - its not going to all be as pretty as I want it to be. And so and forth. I really, ... have no reason to thinking of doing anything other than this - and of course I wouldn't stop for as long as the Light needed me.

So, now I saw shit coming - and whether I reacted now so or then - it kindof comes down to the same thing. "Good for me".

Anyway - the only reality wherein I would truely 'abandon all hope' were that wherein God would throw it all over board. So in a sense of the conjecture that ... certain things I feared would become true. But that is a solid 'nono' - but do we really know? Wink wink. Well - that ... is its own thing - and there is absolutely no reason to believe that anything that terrible might ever occur. Sometimes its more and other times less obvious - and right now, I'm a bit confused. Again.


This is a good mindset for me to rest.//2017.08.04|15:24


What I'm saying is that I think I need to mentally prepare myself for what is ahead - and so I got to pull the breaks hard - and now this ... lets call it a "real life thing" ... now arrives at my writing hands. I've so far come pretty close to expressing the stuff that is on my mind - with very little to none (... maybe) - left but the most contemporary of thoughts. And maybe ... OK. Whatever. I got to worry of my own shit now ... first of all.//16:04//REST