Hmm ...

So, this is one of those moments where I get to think of what I've done so far. Basically thinking, that writing 'even more' only adds to the whole, which might be getting out of hand - and who's actually supposed to keep up or so?

Yet, technically the time is there. I don't have all that much time and - reading these things should go faster than actually writing them.
But starting here my mind actually went elsewhere. It's like ... a creative paralysis. I've heard to it be referred to as Analysis Paralysis, or a Creative Blockade that occurs as one is afraid to destroy a fine thing. Like, a sketchbook. So, one person told me that she'd just "break" the flow on purpose. So, deliberately messing up a page in the sketchbook. Which is perhaps not always possible. But then sometimes, the impossibility is just a mind thing. Like, when painting perhaps. There's a vision, there's a goal. It's "impossible" to mess it up and be fine with it. But it's not impossible to mess it up and take it elsewhere. Experimentation-wise.


And so, somehow, I ended up on the topic of Freedom.


So, in the grand scheme of things - sure. Eventually there might be a point where "the Volumes of Nicole Christina Sonnberger" ... uh, well. It should be pretty messed up at this point already. But should I assume that what I produced is actually good, there would be a point still. But that's all just ... whatever. What matters more is what actually comes out of it; And with that mindset I might actually be able to focus on some kind of duty.

Oh my, ... my head is spinning.

What horrible words I use sometimes!
So, apparently there's nothing to assume for me there!


So, yea. Just being a private person expressing herself on the internet on a private forum.
Well - sort-of-private.

Whatever.


So, Freedom.

Freedom can be scary. Was the idea. And things turmoiling around in my mind - they kind of come together around this conclusion. Too.
And beyond that, I find it scary ... how easy it seems to be to keep our minds locked up in fairy tales.


And so - one Aeon sticks out to me right now that I've previously not spent a lot of attention on. Mostly because ... it's all kind of wishy-washy, get the concept, get the idea, good enough. Inherently one would have a closer understanding with these or those - or maybe we all exhibit one common pattern - when it comes to that. However.
Image.
Or Picture.

As an Aeon of thought, relative to form and wisdom, it allows us to shape and create an idea in our minds, or something. So, if we have little insights here and there - of a greater thing - we can eventually infer the greater thing and 'imagine' it somewhat. Whether that imagination is accurate or not is a different story.
But so, the things that we know of essentially give us what we have to form a "big picture" - and through media presentation I assume it's easy to be of the mind that "we know everything". But this very niche right here - so, my work - should be one example of how obviously wrong that is. And not only that - it's ... almost scary to me, sometimes, to see on what premises some people think or accept certain things. But there's also just ... the simple truth that we can't consider that which we have no knowledge about. I mean, that's what the whole Spy Thriller is all about. That the CIA did mind-control experiments is known and one thing. What they figured out however ... that's a different story. One that goes beyond "pumping people full of drugs is crazy dude!" - I would assume.

And yes, having a high quality foundation to start your empirical construction on is ... not a bad idea. And yea, there is only one you really need.


Freedom is one thing, when you have a goal and a relatively safe understanding of how to get there. Here freedom is about getting there - where ethics is all about ... the degree of consideration we expend beyond our own self-interest.

This freedom is, in essence, still however just a relatively narrow tube. Or: The more ethical we are, the broader it becomes. That's because any degree of consideration beyond ones own self-interest is to potentially show a bump in what would otherwise be a straight line. Challenges occur that wouldn't only not have existed otherwise, but they're also more complex because the issue isn't merely an obstacle. This however also means - should it matter - that a broader "range of the true freedom must be consulted to come up with a satisfactory solution".

Conversely, extended considerateness should train problem solving skills in the free space - and such. More complex base-line, higher default standards of everything.


And yea - that ... even works ... like ... . The scary thing is ... when we're starting to ask the questions that we shouldn't, even worse, if those that start asking them could even go about answering them. Or am I wrong? I mean, technically we should be free to ask - since, isn't that what the story of Eden is all about?
Possibly. But what we do with it ... .

It's often brought up in the context of medicine. There's also at least one Star Trek episode on the matter. Several, for sure, if we extend the context beyond just medicine. And here one can even bring in the concept of considerateness. What's more considerate?

But what's truly in there? I mean, "the more you know". I sure would argue that knowledge puts you into an odd spot if only you have it. Or if it's otherwise limited. So, I'd say that you would have to act according to your knowledge. But that's also why they say that Justice is, or must be blind. Or why she has a scale.
Whatever. The thing is ... it all comes back together in the, uh, let me call it "base considerateness" - as the theoretical ideal where the cost:effect ratio is perfect - ...


Hmm ... what am I doing here?
I'm ... thinking. Rationalizing ideas. Trying to give form to chaotic manifestations within my psyche.


And I'm thinking I have a good idea here. I mean - it's idealistic and axiomatically simple. The axiomatic simplicity of it produces a clear vision or idea of what is to be had - and generates a kind of common sense baseline image of how we're looking at the general concept of society.
Perhaps. I mean - it should ... come as a given where the next step becomes practically self-evident.


So - in terms of freedom and goals and cans and cannots - in this instance I'm simply meditating upon something that could be or become a cultural pillar. So, in sense and function. Like in a piece of fiction. So, the culture would carry this sense as part of their culture - and in it everyone is thus passively trained to see the benefits of this way of living. From the baseline an understanding would emerge that can in essence only be matched but never outdone.
Either however only adds to it - in theory.

So, back to ethics, there is - in a way - a clear duality that emerges. As the application of "high ethics" is likewise the deviation from a straight line, there is a "not to do" in those that remain on that straight line. And it is in this ego trip where the scary things begin to unfold - as the limits to their doings are simply unknown.

Conversely those that choose ethics over ignorance become fiends to those that follow the straight line. And in all this I kind of have to wonder: What's the goal there? I mean, if it's all just driven by selfishness ... ugh.


Uhm ... I'm going to something else now.


Hmm ...

OK. So, what would ... a "Dark Tome" look like? What should go in there?
I believe - well, for once we're getting to a point where we stop Role Playing "oh, we have a book" and move on to the practical concern. And here - to an extent - it turns out that the role-play is a practical effort that has a functional purpose.


Sort of.

It's almost like there's just an in-between in which the practical concerns only determine a form - as the practical almost inevitably scoops from a greater source that comes about through efforts of whichever kind of nature. However one would sell their work to themselves.

Now, something feels weird. Was I wrong there?
I mean: The Role-Play that occurs within the assembly to for once produce but to also fill it with some sense or meaning. It's how "Content Creators" 'play a Character' that's the primary driver behind the whole thing. The Character is there intertwined with a presentation - which together makes the package that the viewer finds interest in. The general expectation from there, as I've gathered, is some kind of frequency and self-similarity. So, the trend that content boils down to Characters is basically ... inevitable.


Such as the commemoration of some kind of social unity through some kind of ... symbol. I mean, we all live somewhere - so, you know what I mean. So, that is the next step from mere Content to History. Yet is content also a driving factor. The ideas or ideals associated with a symbol give it its power, and they also tell us a part of the story.

To have a book - that has content - is in this sense a necessity. Though technically if you want to play Guru you can also do without. Written content then also makes it easier to share the idea - so, I personally am looking forward to perhaps a ... 90 page or so volume - with perhaps a more civilized structure - i.e. collecting the important stuff in form of a compendium placed somewhere in the middle. Or so. Well, just an idea. But buffered back and out somehow - and also convenient to reach.
Subsequently the Volume should be frontloaded ceremoniously, to say, the narrative of what it contains and the narrative that it provides should be in sync. So, perhaps 'exalted form' is a more proper and distinguishable term. Its exalted form should imply its value as a religious item - for once, or first and foremost, while also maintaining the aura of both, "academia" and the occult - centered around the higher truth it proclaims to speak of.

So, it is perhaps kind of complicated. I mean, well. Lofty ideas aside - the form eventually has to bend to the demands of the content it is meant to carry.
Here I should make it a challenge to myself, to force out a clean narrative that shaves away as much of the perhaps and maybe as possible, without entirely disintegrating. I may hereto employ some artistic freedoms - but in so doing I must be careful to not negatively distort its value.

So, I would first think of situations where form carries the content. Logical bridges, transitions, changes of scenery, multiplexes - that sort of thing. Things that the word alone, or the cold truth alone, has difficulties employing.
The rest is just ... doing the work.


So, I have taken note - so there's three primary Aspects - followed by a fourth. Here I would draw my circle - leaving ... .


Hmm ... I'm really not sure yet.

Well. There's "Social Theory" and there's ... . Well - four would or could also wrap up the compendium - but ... hmm. Well, so - we'll have to see. I mean, a part of it is certainly open. So, either that, or I'll look for something else to wrap into it.

Which is - yea - the final question: What is it for? What would it represent? If anything.


I mean, in some way - a piece of writing like that would ... also be somewhat antithetical to the Gnostic idea. Wouldn't it? I mean - it would have to be really good to not just be ... ancient dust and history. So, I don't know. Right now I however also don't really have the drive for it. But ... still.
There's so much that still irks me, I'm afraid I'm set for a few years - perhaps the rest of my life even. Oh my ...